The Way I Loved You
by ladyxelena
Summary: Series of RobStar moments in drabbles that don't particularly relate to one another. Events leading up to Robin and Starfire getting together. Will eventually be continued into a full story. For language reasons, rated M.
1. Year One

Year One: Starfire, Raven, Beast Boy: Age 15 Robin: Age 16 Cyborg: Age 17

**The Beginning**

On a Friday afternoon, I was sitting at the desk in my new room in Titans Tower reading the local newspaper. If I'm being honest, I'd have to say I'm a bit obsessed with keeping up on everything's that's going on in Jump City. After all, it's my city to protect now. Err- our city to protect.

Over the past two months, I've found that getting used to being part of a team is a bit difficult. Especially for someone like me. I spent most of my time with Batman trying to prove that I was his equal, if not better than him. With a team, and a team that I lead, it's about working with each others strengths and weaknesses to get the job done. I have to teach those who aren't used to combat, unlike Beast Boy, who I hear was also part of another team at some point. The Doom Patrol or something.

God, he's annoying sometimes. I like the kid enough, but I can't be in a room alone with him for more than fifteen minutes. I guess I get along with Cyborg better, but he wants to be a leader too. He doesn't argue with me, but I can feel it when he disagrees. It seems like he and Beast Boy have bonded over pranking Raven, who rarely comes out of her room anyway. I haven't really spoken to her much. Not that I'm afraid of her, but I don't want to get on her bad side. All I know is she's from, like, another dimension or whatever. To be honest, I don't know much about any of them.

Then there's Starfire. The girl I barely know, but who kissed me the day we met. She's the one that I know the most about; she landed here on earth when she was trying to escape from the Gordanian's. She told us that they were holding her prisoner and were transporting her to the Citadel-another thing I hardly know about-but she found a way to break free. We don't exactly know why they were taking her. She just told us there was some dispute with her home planet, Tamaran.

I feel goosebumps prick along my arms at the thought of her. God, I hardly know the girl, but she's just… She's great. I've tried to talk with her more, but I end up getting nervous. I lean back in my seat with a huff of my breath, frustrated. Sheesh, I'm a superhero, damn it. I'm not supposed to have these sissy little crushes. I don't have time for that.

I slam the newspaper down on my desk and get up. Gotta think of something else. I look down at my watch. About time for lunch, let's see if Cyborg's making anything today. I open my bedroom door, and as I turn back around to lock it up, I hear footsteps coming down the hall. I crane my head around the corner and see Starfire walking towards me, head looking down at the ground, and a sullen look on her face. I raise my eyebrow. She always seems so happy. What could possibly be wrong with her?

She sighs deeply as she continues walking, nearly straight into me. She yelps -in an adorable little "eep" kind of way- and jumps back, startled. I can't help but smile and wait as she recovers from the scare. She looks at me, and I see a hint of blush on her cheeks. But then she tilts her head to this side with a big question mark plastered to her forehead.

"Umm," I say patting my hand around on my chest, thinking to myself _Holy shit there's something on me, I look like an idiot. _

"Robin, I did not know that you wear the spectacles," she says in her soft little sing-song voice. I freeze. Oh God, not my glasses. I reach up to pull the metal wires from the bridge of my nose. I tap around my eyes making sure my mask is secure on my face, then I fold them up and grip them in my shaking hand. I hope she doesn't notice that I'm blushing now, too.

"Yeah, uhh, I was doing some reading."

"I see. I attempted to read the earthen book. But it contained so many words that I did not know. Cyborg referred to it as the slang."

"I was reading the newspaper." The words sound strangled from my throat. Good God, she didn't ask what I was reading. Just let her talk.

"Oh. May I ask what it is that you are doing now?" Her big green eyes zero in on my masked ones. I nearly forgot what she asked.

"Err- I was going down to the common room to get some lunch." I look at the tall, orange skinned girl, with her shoulders slumped and a frown on her face. "Wanna come with?" Her eyes brightened.

"Of course!" she exclaims, and I jump at the sudden volume in her voice. She wraps her hand around my wrist and pulls me along as we make our way to the elevator. My skin tingles where she touches it.

"You seem happier," I inquire.

"I suppose I was feeling lonely," she says as we enter the elevator. She presses the button and the doors close in front of us.

"Starfire, you live with four people. How can you be lonely?"

"Well," she begins, looking down at her hands folded in front of her, "Cyborg was working on something in the garage, Beast Boy was playing the video games, and Raven told me to 'go away' when I knocked on her door." I frown. How could anyone not want to hang out with her? The door opens and I follow her out. We pass through the living room, where Beast Boy plays on the GameStation, and into the kitchen.

As I start rummaging through the fridge, I ask, "So I assume you were coming to see me next?" She doesn't answer, and when I look at her, she seems to be nervously rubbing her hands up and down her arms.

"Robin, I… You just seem so busy all the time… I would feel like I was being the annoying, as Raven calls it."

"She called you-?" There was something like a growl in the back of my throat. "Starfire, you could've come to me if you wanted to."

"Truly?" she asks. I nod and smile at her. She finally returns the smile, reaching from ear to ear and making her eyes shine. "Oh Robin, thank you!" She throws her arms around me and lifts me up from the ground in a crippling hug. I forget how strong she is by just looking at her.

"Star-fire-Too-tight…" She giggles as she sets me back down. I wheeze, but grin, happy that I could make her happy.

"Alright," I say, looking into the fridge again. "We got… eggs. And mustard. And some strawberries… I can't make a meal out of this." I sigh as I closes up the fridge and moves to the cupboard. When I hear the fridge open up again behind me, I turn to find Starfire holding the bottle of mustard way too close to her mouth.

"Starfire no! Don't eat-" The yellow liquid leaks onto her tongue and I cringe, waiting for her to spit it out. But instead, a smile forms on her lips, and she squeezes more into her mouth. Now I'm cringing for a different reason.

"Why should I not eat this, Robin?" she asks as she licks her lips. "It is quite delicious. Reminds me of a delicacy on Tamaran."

"It's just that uhh, normally humans don't just eat mustard by itself."

"Then what is it for?"

"We put it on, like, hot dogs and stuff."

"Well I think that it is perfectly fine on it's own," she declares, taking another swig before she places it back in the fridge. She wipes her mouth on her arm, and I chuckle. "What?" she asks, looking somewhat insulted.

"Nothing. You're just funny, that's all."

"You are doing the laughing at me?" Her eyebrows furrow, and I see moisture in her eyes.

"No, no!" I cry, moving in front of her and placing my hands on her shoulders. "I just think you're… interesting."

"Oh. I do believe you are…" She trails off, seeming to be in deep thought. I think back to the day we met, when I unlocked her handcuffs. I told her I was trying to be nice. She said the closest word to nice on her planet meant weak.

"Uhh, _rutha_?" I ask, repeating the word she said to me that day. She smiles shyly.

"No. You are anything but weak," she says tenderly. I feel my throat close up and sweat bead on my forehead. God, what this girl does to me. "You are nice." She considers the word, and nods her head like she's sure of it.

Just then my stomach growls, and Starfire laughs out loud.

"It appears that you are quite hungry indeed."

"Yeah, maybe we can get the team together for pizza."

"Perhaps you will go and ask Raven, and I shall ask Beast Boy?" I nod, and we disperse.

In the end, Raven gives me a flat out know, saying that she's busy meditating. Beast Boy didn't even respond to Starfire; he had a line of drool pooling out of his mouth and he didn't remove his eyes from the large screen television.

"Maybe Cy will wanna go," I say. I begin walking to the garage door, but Starfire yanks me back towards her, nearly causing me to topple over. But she rights me just before I fall.

"Do you think that perhaps we could simply get the pizza together?"

"J-J-Just us?" Did I seriously just stutter? Fuck my life. I clear my throat and try to focus past the lure of her big green eyes. "Uhh, sure."

"Glorious! It is like a day of bonding for us, yes?" I find her smile contagious.

"Yeah, I guess it is." I'm pretty sure my heart's going to pound right out of my chest.

**The Rings**

_Tighten my grip. There, better. Okay arms straight out… hold it… and exhale._

"Robin, what are you doing?"

My elbows suddenly wobble and bend at the sound of her voice, causing me to fall out of my iron cross. As I dangle for the rings, I look over to the doorway at Starfire. She's dressed in these spandex-looking shorts and a tight tank top. I once heard her telling Raven that she likes to wear tight and comfortable clothing while training, because on her home planet they often go naked. My throat tightens at the thought. But I shake the thoughts away. She's my best friend. Nothing more.

"Uh, these are gymnastics rings," I answer.

"What are they for? Do they prepare you for battle in some way?"

"Not really. But they help with strength. You gotta be really strong to hold yourself up in some of these positions." I demonstrate by swinging forward and up, ending up in somewhat of a handstand with my arms out straight. I look down at her, hoping to see awe in her face, but she looks smug.

"Well I can do that," she says. I laugh and drop myself back down.

"Okay. You have a turn." She nods and takes my place at the rings. And she effortlessly lifts up from the ground and into a mirroring stance. "Flying is cheating, Star."

"I disagree. One must be very strong to fly, yes? You cannot do it," she teases.

"No, one must be an alien or something to fly," I say matter-of-factly. She touches her feet back to the ground and begins walking towards me. "Nuh uh, you're gonna do it the right way." She huffs, be obediently walks back to the rings. I stand beside her as she grabs onto them. "Okay, so first swing forward, and when you get some height, use your abdominals to lift up your legs." She does so, and almost gets straight up, but falls back down. She lets out a huff of breath, and I notice sweat on her forehead.

"Here I go," she says, seemingly to herself. She tries again and gets up.

"Now straighten out your arms!" I say quickly. But she falls down again. "Just put your arms out sooner and you're golden." She nods and swings upward once again. This time her body forms the pose, but she can't keep her legs together. "You just need some more practice. Now that you can get up, you just gotta work on the little things."

She releases herself and stands before me, raking the back of her hand over her forehead. "I believe I dislike the human way of this exercise."

"Well, it's my favorite," I say, going back to the rings.

"Where did you learn to do these things? From the Batman?" I snort.

"Nah, he couldn't get his fat ass up here if he tried." But the humor fades from me. I don't know if I really want to talk about where I learned how to do this. I look into her curious eyes. I guess if I were ever to talk about it, I'd want it to be with her.

"Robin?" Her eyebrows furrow. I guess I've been staring at her for too long.

"Um, my parents and I; we were acrobats in a circus-"

"'Acrobats'? And what is a 'circus'?" I chuckle. They couldn't torture this information out of me, but I find her adorable.

"We did stunts, where we would hold onto these swinging bars and let go, but we would grab onto another bar. It looked like we were flying. And actually, they called us-" I choked. Holy shit, I almost just gave her my identity. God, this girl does crazy things to my brain. "Uh, yeah but a circus is a place with cool animals and games and people who do awesome tricks. I loved it when I was a kid." Starfire was smiling with a glassy look in her eyes.

"Oh it sounds wondrous! Perhaps one day we can all visit one of these circuses you speak of."

"Yea, maybe some day, Star." But I don't think I could handle that. Brings back too many terrible memories.

"So is that why you like it when I take you flying with me?" I consider that for a second. That would only make sense.

"I guess so, yeah. I just like the feeling of being up in the air with nothing helping you. Well, except for you of course. But without you I'd fall to my death."

"And I would never let that happen, Robin." She smiles at me, one which I return.

"Alright, is everyone ready to go?" I ask, changing the subject before she could ask more about my parents and our former careers. The team and I had been planning for going out for pizza and a movie tonight.

"I believe so. I must do the changing, but then I am ready."

"Okay. I gotta shower. Meet you in the common room in twenty minutes?" She nods, and I grin, subconsciously eager for the moment that I get to see her again.

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**So as it says in the description, I plan on making this into a full fledged story once I get through all of these little one shots. This is just the journey through the awkward teenage crush phase in Robin and Starfire's relationship leading up to when they finally make it official.**

**Review please!**


	2. Year Two

Year Two: Starfire, Raven, Beast Boy: Age 16 Robin: Age 17 Cyborg: Age 18

**Transformation**

I rapped my fist against Starfire's door. We had just gotten her back yesterday, after she left earth during what she called her "transformation". She hasn't left her room all day and I was starting to get worried. Plus, I have something that I want to give to her.

I knocked again and tried to listen through the door. She probably won't be too happy about this, but I type in the masters code to her door. When it opens, I find her laying on her round bed, face down in her pillows. I stepped into the room and the door shut behind me. Is she asleep? Even as I walk towards her, she doesn't stir. I take a seat at the foot of her bed.

"Starfire," I say, quietly at first. "Starfire?" Louder now, and I shake her leg. "Hey, Star!" I somewhat shout this time, and in her surprise, she shoots two eyebeams into the wall in front of her. I jump, startled. She turns around in her bed to face me, eyes still glowing green. But they settle back to normal when she registers that its me.

"Robin… what are you doing in here?"

"I wanted to see how you were doing. You know, after the past couple of days."

"Oh," she says shyly. She floats up out of her bed and tucks her feet beneath her in an Indian pose. She settles back down on the bed in front of me. "I am doing the okay now." But something in her voice makes me question her.

"Star, you know you can talk to me." I place my hand on her knee and I notice that she stiffens. "What's bothering you?" I can see her considering answering my question. She lets out a long sigh and plays with her hands in her lap. But finally she looks up at me, and her eyes seem glassy with tears. Oh God, I don't know what to do if she cries.

"I suppose I just… If I would have had someone to be there for me during my transformation, I would not have been so afraid of what was happening to me."

"Well we were here for you." Starfire smiles at me.

"Yes, but that is not what I mean exactly. While it is nice to have friends like all of you, what I needed during this experience was… another Tamaranean. A female."

"So, your mother?" I watch as something changes in her expression, but I'm not sure what. She looks strangely like she just got shot; there's a pained look in her eyes, and I can't tell if she's breathing.

"My mother-" she makes a choking sound. I scoot towards her reflexively and touch her shoulder. My eyes watch her, but she won't look up. She sniffles. "My mother is no longer living." Her voice was so soft, I almost didn't hear it.

This girl who was always so bright and happy, so talkative and involved and curious. So strong in ways that I wasn't. She was my opposite, and I never really expected to have something in common with her. Not anything like this.

"Starfire, I'm so sorry." I was amazed at how gentle my voice sounded. I've never been one to comfort others. I guess I figured I didn't know how. But with Starfire… I always just want to protect her. And I can't protect her from a pain like this.

"It was a very long time ago. She was murdered." I widened my eyes.

"You don't have to talk about this," I say, rubbing my hand on her back. She finally looks up at me, her green eyes holding so much sadness. Right now, she looks much older than she really is. Like she's seen too much for her age. I only know so much about her. That she is a Tamaranean Princess. That she was supposed to be taken to the Citadel for a peace offering. I know that her sister is vindictive and manipulative, but I've never heard anything about her parents.

"It is okay. My mother's death is not the worst of my memories." I see her shudder at some memory, and it worries me. A parent's death is traumatic enough. What else has she endured? "After I was sent away in the treaty, my mother couldn't handle it. She fought with my father, ordering for him to demand my return. He believed she was endangering Tamaran with her behavior. He had her killed." I could do nothing but stare at her, and she stared back. I watched as the moisture in her eyes slowly faded, and she composed herself. Eventually she smiled.

"Robin, you are my very best friend. I do not mind sharing these things with you because I feel they will help you understand me." I nod, but in my mind I'm having a conversation with myself. Should I tell her about my parents? How we share a common loss? "Robin, do you think I am pretty?"

Her question caught me off guard and I lost my train of thought. I opened and closed my mouth several times, but she continued to look at me with those bright, curious eyes.

"Star, we've been over all of this. You didn't have to run away just because of your appearance. Even if you really were changing like you that you were, you still would've had us. We'd never stop being your friends just because of the way you look."

"Oh, I know that now. In fact, I believe I knew that all along. I was just scared." Now she looks away from me again and back down at her fiddling hands. "I just wanted to know what _you_ thought about my appearance." She spoke with confidence, but she wouldn't look at me.

"Well, uhh… Star, you already know." My voice sounds hoarse and nervous. God, I wish Cy were here to slap me right now. Her shoulders slump. Why am I just so damn terrible at this stuff?

"I-I think you're r-really pretty, Star." For the love of God, may lightning strike me where I sit.

"More so than _Kitten_?" Starfire's voice sounds almost like a growl. I chuckle, and she shoots me a look.

"Yeah. Wayyyy more." She smiles, satisfied. My heart is, like, fluttering. She's jealous? Of someone who wanted me? My smile turns smug. I bet if she could read my thoughts, she'd blast me.

"So this whole transformation thing… it all happens when you turn 16?" I ask.

"Yes. Well, the week of a Tamaranean female's equivalent of the earthen 16th birthday," she clarifies. I nod, but then realize something.

"Okay then, so when is your actual birthday?" She smiles knowingly.

"It is today."

"Why didn't you tell us?"

"I was not really feeling the mood to celebrate my birthday," she says. Then she looks up at me from beneath her eyelashes. "But I am feeling much better now after this time with you." My cheeks grow warm.

"Anytime, Star. You know I'm always here." I take her hand, merely as a friendly gesture. But I feel something stirring beneath my skin. "How about we go show you what an earthen birthday is all about?" She grins and rises up from the bed, pulling me out the door with her.

**Apprentice**

"Robin… Robin, if not the others, then let me in. Please."

My room was dark and I could barely seem my own hands. But I don't feel that I'm worthy of anything but darkness. Slade. Robin. Now I see that they are synonyms. I never realized how much I was truly like him, until these past few days.

I betrayed my friends. A true hero never would've given in. They would've outsmarted the villain and saved their friends. But instead I did his bidding and I… I may have actually enjoyed it.

The rush of the escape…the chase…what the hell is the matter with me?

I've gone against everything I believe in. And yet, my friends forgive me. They let me come home. They were happy to have me back. And even Starfire, who I hurt more than the others… she showed me her smile, and the joy in her big green eyes.

Oh, Starfire. That night on the Wayne Enterprises building, when Slade punished them because I wouldn't listen… I saw it in her eyes; accusation, disgust, disappointment. She looked at me like I lost her trust and her friendship. That's what truly broke me. If I lost Starfire, I don't know if there would be anything left for me in Jump City.

But here I sit in the Titans Tower in Jump, in the middle of my bedroom floor enveloped in darkness. Listening to the desperate voice of my best friend outside of my door.

"Robin," she says sternly. She rarely uses such a tone. I perk up and look up toward my door. "I demand that I be given entrance. You do not need to be doing the wallowing in self pity." My eyes widened. I haven't been lectured like that since I lived in Gotham. "I will break down this door." She's kind of adorable when she's angry.

I roll up from the ground and walk to my door. When I open it, I'm greeted with a tall alien with glowing green eyes.

"Come in, I guess," I mutter. I turn back around and sit right back on the floor. I hear the door shut, but there is silence. My bedroom light is still off. Maybe she decided not to come in.

"It is quite dark," says her squeaky voice. I smile involuntarily. Suddenly there's a green glow in the room and I let her walk over to me. She joins me on the floor, mirroring my position of my arms wrapped around my knees, except she's floating. I don't look at her. I can't look at her. "Robin. What is the matter?" A laugh erupts from my throat and out of the corner of my eye I see her jump.

"Star, I… I was just working for Slade. Like, three hours ago."

"Oh Robin, but we all know why you had to do that. It is okay, any one of us would have done the same thing to keep our friends safe-"

"But you don't understand!" My voice rises to a shout. I place my hands on either side of my head. "I'm just like him."

"No! You will never say that again. You are not Slade, you are Robin. My very best friend, a kind, powerful hero."

"Or I'm Robin, Batman's protégé, leader of the Teen Titans, good guy gone bad." There is a soft thump as she sets herself down onto the floor, and before I know it, her arms are wrapped around my shoulders.

At first, I stiffen at the touch. It is much softer than her usual hugs. This is more… intimate. And while, as the leader of this team, I should pull away and show disproval of her actions, I cannot. Instead I lean further into her embrace and rest my head on her shoulder.

"I nearly lost it, Star. I was losing myself."

"But you came back to us, where you belong," she croons, rubbing her hand up and down my arm. My eyes flutter shut as I listen to her steady breathing.

"I'll never forget the way you looked at me that night," I say, my voice so quiet its almost inaudible. "I'm so sorry."

"Shh, you have nothing to apologize to me for. I am the one who should be sorry. For a moment, I almost believed… I saw you as someone else. Someone who could be like Slade." It's like a stab to the heart. "But you are not, Robin," she quickly amends, "and you never will be."

"But even you saw that it's possible-"

"No I did not," she interjects. "I lost sight of what was true. And the truth is that you are a good person. From the day I met you, you have been nothing but good." I feel her arms tighten around me. Usually I would continue to argue with her, unbelieving even if some part of me thought that maybe she was telling the truth. But the sound of her voice is so assuring.

I feel her arms tighten briefly before they release me. I lean away and look at her, seeing that a tear has dripped down her cheek.

"Star, wha-?"

"It is okay. I was just so afraid when I thought we had lost you. It was a selfish fear. I only thought of how hard it would be to lose my best friend."

"I'm not going anywhere."

"Yes, you are," she says. My eyes widen. She giggles and rises up from the ground, pulling my hand and lifting me onto my feet. "You are going downstairs and spend some time with your friends." I laugh at her mock-serious expression, but she can't hold a straight face.

"Yes, ma'am," I tease as I walk with her to the door. I turn down the hall to the elevator but notice that she's no longer walking beside me. I look back behind me to see her walking the opposite way. "Star?" I ask, turning around. She looks back at me.

"I am feeling quite tired. I think I will just shower and prepare for sleep." I nod, feeling a little deflated. But I won't tell her how badly I want her to come with me and hang out. There was a time recently when I never thought we could be friends again. That I'd lost her forever. Instead of telling her this, I just smile in goodbye and begin to turn back around.

But then she floats toward me and touches my shoulder. I prepare myself for another Starfire hug, but I'm surprised when what I receive is a feather-light kiss on my cheek. I feel the blush creep along my face as I look at her in shock, but she just grins at me and turns back down the other direction. My eyes stay glued to her until I watch her disappear into her room.

I wonder if she feels the same fluttery feeling in her chest.

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**Reviews please!**


	3. Year Three pt 1

**Warning: Dialogue on my last two installments will be different from the actual episodes**

**Enjoy!**

* * *

Year Three: Starfire, Raven, Beast Boy: Age 17 Robin: Age 18 Cyborg: Age 19

**Jealousy**

I was engulfed in a cloud of red. At first I just couldn't see anything outside of the smog, but then I began to feel light headed. I tried to find my way out, but I grew weaker, my breath growing shorter. Just before I collapsed, I was surrounded by blackness, and suddenly I was flying. I smiled at Raven, who stood beside me on a black disk as we flew after the others. Far up ahead was Red X, but Starfire was hot on his tail. I was just about to tell Raven to hurry, but my glance at her said enough. Soon we had caught up to Beast Boy, who was holding Cyborg in his pterodactyl claws.

Red X and Starfire turned a corner, and I was anxious to catch up. Red X is kinda flirty when it comes to Star. Makes me want to do more than simply arrest his ass. As Raven and I reached that same corner, I leapt from the black disk, tucking and rolling onto the ground.

Beast Boy, still as a pterodactyl, was stuck in some kind of red netting. Cyborg had a red x on his back, and he was fighting to get it off.

"Dude, its messing with my circuits!" he exclaimed, and as Raven assisted Beast Boy, I helped Cyborg pry this thing off.

Up ahead was Starfire, who had just broken out of two red constraints on her hands. I kept my eyes on her as she shot a starbolt at Red X, which caused him to crash onto the ground. He got his bearings and turned to Starfire, stalking towards her as her threw various devices in her way. She surrounded herself with a large starbolt to block them. With Cyborg finally freed, I took off toward Starfire.

Just as Red X was backing her against a wall.

I felt my face grow hot with anger when I saw him grab at her wrist. His masked face leaned close to her. I bounded towards them and threw myself in front of her, jabbing my fist in the direction of his mask. It connected, but he didn't back off much.

"Leave her alone," I growl, and I instinctively wrapped my arm back around her.

"She's not your girlfriend. So she's fair game, kid," Red X taunted.

"I can take care of myself, you chlorbag!" growled Starfire behind me. I had just registered the angry tone in her words when I felt an impact against my back and was sent flying. She had used just enough of her strength to send me quite a distance away, but not enough to hurt me.

I jerked my head back to look at her and saw her eyes shining green as she glowered at me. Now I felt even angrier. But I was angry with her.

Her momentary distraction allowed Red X to restrain her with a giant "x" against the wall. Raven flew up beside me.

"What the hell was that?" she asks. But I was just too pissed off to speak. And to top it off, I could tell by Starfire's face that Red X was speaking to her. She didn't like what he had to say.

I jumped back up from the ground and sprinted towards them again. The others followed behind me as I swept my bow staff under Red X's feet. I couldn't believe he was distracted enough not to notice me approaching. He fell to the ground, and gorilla-form Beast Boy scooped him up in his arms. Cyborg stood guard in front of the safe door, holding the xenothium that Red X was after. I was just about to place the handcuffs on Red X, but he began to fade. I looked down to his belt and saw his hand against the teleporter.

"See you later, chuckles." I swiped my hands through his shimmering form, but he was gone. I slammed the handcuffs to floor and snarled.

Beast Boy changed back with a frown on his face. "Well, at least he didn't get the xenothium, right?" he asks. I looked over to Cyborg, who just shrugged his shoulders. Red X doesn't necessarily have to use the door.

"We'll leave that to the authorities," I grumble. Still attached to the wall, Starfire grunts as she tries to free herself. Beast Boy takes a step in her direction but I reach out and stop him. "Don't bother. She can take care of herself." I didn't look at her again as I began walking back through the building. I didn't hear footsteps behind me. Just the rage-filled scream of one pissed off Tamaranean.

…..

I rode my motorcycle back home, not checking in with the team before I took off. We're all going to the same place anyway. We don't have to babysit each other. Starfire had ridden with me to the warehouse when we got the call, but I didn't ask if she wanted to tag along on the way back. Right now I didn't really care to speak to her.

I didn't think it was possible for me to really be angry with Starfire. Usually any little bit of annoyance I might be storing melts away when I look at her. She just looks so innocent and happy… how can you be mad at her? But the look she gave me today when she shoved me, her tone of voice when she snapped at me, it set something off inside me.

I press my garage door opener and pull in, carelessly setting my bike up on its stand and chucking my helmet into the corner. I tear off my riding jacket and cast it away as I head for the door.

They're all sitting in the common room when I get there. Maybe Raven had just teleported them or something, I don't even really care. But when I locate Starfire, I make a beeline for her, ignoring a comment by Beast Boy as I grasp her wrist and pull her forcefully out of the room. I subconsciously think that my grip would probably hurt a human girl, but if Starfire really wanted to get away she easily could. I barely register her protests. Just lead her into the training room and close the door behind us.

I let go of her wrist turn to face her, crossing my arms. I note the glare that has settled on her face, her jaw slanted and tensed.

"What the _hell_ was that, Starfire?" I ask, my voice surprisingly quiet and controlled, when really my mind is racing and crazy.

"Oh come on, Robin. I will not take this." She places her hands on her hips.

"Who do you think you are? Shoving me across the fucking room, shouting at me, acting against me?!"

"You will not curse in front of me," she says sternly.

"I'll do whatever the hell I want, I'm your leader."

"But what you did was not _leading_ me, now was it? Placing yourself in between me and a criminal was selfish, and-"

"Selfish?" he interjected. "He was closing in on you, Starfire, and you were just letting him-"

"You did not give me a chance! I was waiting for an opportune moment, to find a weak spot. You deemed me defenseless and threw yourself in front of me." And at that point, we were talking over each other.

I shouted above her voice, "Oh sure, yeah, you were just waiting? He was, like, centimeters away from you!"

She continued, "So you just _had_ to jump in and protect me, Robin? Do you truly believe that I am not strong enough to take on a human? My strength is greater than that of yours and you know it!"

"Protect you?" Our voices battled one another's. "Do _you _really believe that you're my first goddamned priority? That all my focus-"

"Yes I do!" she shouts, overpowering me. She takes deliberate steps towards me as she speaks, "I believe that you feel like you need to protect me! That something within you drives you to watch my every move and wait for the moment that you think I need you! And when, of all people, Red X got too close to me, you snapped!" She paused, seeming to catch her breath as I did the same. My arms fell to my sides as I just stared at her. I couldn't speak. But she continued. "And that is why this bothers you so much," she says quieter now, "because I did not need you. I do not."

I looked down at the floor. "You say you don't need me, huh?" I cringe at the sound of my voice. I sound so defeated. I hear her footsteps approach me, and her shoes move into my vision. I look up at her after a moment. Her face holds so much emotion. It's amazing how much she can feel. And just how opposite we really are.

"Robin. I was trained by the Warlords of Okaara for many years, and I am a princess of a warrior planet. On my planet, what you did would have been shaming. It would have declared me as weak, and that is how all of my people would see me." She sighs, her eyebrows slanting and forming an apologetic expression. "I love working on a team, Robin, I truly do. But what I do not love is being seen as incompetent. In my lifetime, I have had more training than Cyborg and Raven combined. And yet, you do not feel the need to protect them?" I feel a blush creeping into my cheeks, and I lower my gaze back to the ground.

"I'm sorry, Star. I just… You're important, you know that? You're my best friend." She places a hand on my arm and I look back up at her. Her smile is warm and soothing.

"Star? Uhh, wha-what was Red X saying to you that made you so upset?" Her demeanor changes at my question and she drops her hand from my arm.

"You do not want to know, Robin." Her voice is quiet and innocent, and her answer causes the anger to bubble up inside me once again. I clench my fists.

"God damn it-"

"Please do not do the cursing," she requests calmly. My shoulders slump and I release my fists, my white knuckles returning back to their normal color.

"Robin, there is an underlying reason for your behavior, is there not?" I remained quiet, knowing exactly what she was addressing, but not wanting to admit anything. I'm the leader of this team. Her leader. And we are heroes. Bruce's words echo through me head…_Never get involved with a member of your team._

"Star, I can't…" I let my voice trail off and I can tell by her expression that she understands what I'm saying. Or not saying, I guess.

"I may not always need you in battle, Robin. Times may come when I do, although I am strong. But you are important to me, too." She smiles, and I return it. I can feel my palms sweating at her inquisitions. She sees right through me.

"Okay. Well, uh, I gotta go fill the report for today. I'll talk to you later?" She just nods and I turn back around. Before the door shuts behind me, I just barely catch her words.

"…more important than you know…"

**Stranded**

(Warning: I'm changing the dialogue a bit…)

I took a few steps back from the edge and burst forward in a run. Pushing off from the rock, I launched myself downward after a falling Starfire. Her hands reached forward towards me, fists grabbing at nothing but empty air. Her voice shrilly screams my name and I am willing myself to fall faster. Why is it that she can't fly?

But I finally get to her, grabbing her hands and pulling her body against mine. With one hand around her waist I reach down for my grappling hook, simultaneously searching for a place to swing into. A hole in the wall of rock catches my eye, so I am and shoot. I feel Starfire tuck her head into the crook of my neck as I swing full speed toward the cavern. Pieces of rock collide against my skin sharply, but I'm just worrying about Starfire.

As we quickly approach the cavern, I release the grappling hook, sending us flying into the darkness. We hit the ground sharply, but I take the full blow to my back. We continue to roll until I finally brace my arms against the ground and stop us, my body hovering over hers. And the only reason I can tell how close my face is to hers in this darkness is because I can feel her breath on my cheeks.

I clear my throat, pushing off the ground so I'm now standing.

"Can you still make your starbolts?" I ask. The green light illuminating the cavern is my answer. "Damn it, the rocks caved in." Large boulders completely covered the way we came in, making it seemingly impossible to get out. I let out a sigh, which turns into a shiver. I didn't realize how cold it was until just now.

We end up building a fire together in silence. I found some tree roots that had broken in through the cracks of the rocks and Starfire used her powers to create the flame. The fire cast a pretty orange glow across the cave, making my skin the same shade as Starfire's. I slumped against the cave wall feeling suddenly tired. When Starfire began walking to the other side of the cave, I reached out for her wrist.

"Star, will you please just talk to me?" I ask. She finally looks at me for the first time since we've been down here, and her eyes widen when they reach mine. My eyebrows furrow.

"Robin, you are bleeding!" she exclaims. She lifts her hands up towards my face but stops herself, and I see a flicker of something in her eyes as she drops her hands. "You have many cuts on your face and arms," she says quietly, lowering her gaze once again. I touch my fingers to my cheek and pull them back to look. Yep, there's a slick redness. But it doesn't hurt. I look down at my arms. Why didn't I notice these cuts?

"That's okay. I don't even feel them," I mutter. I look at Starfire who stands in front of me, but won't look at me. I sigh. "Starfire, come on."

"There is nothing to talk about," she says sharply.

"Yes, there is," I copy her tone of voice. "What happened back there? Why couldn't you fly?"

"My flight is affected by my emotions. It is the same for all Tamaranean's. We need to summon joy in order to fly."

"But your starbolts and eyebeams… they aren't affected by emotions?"

"Not in the same way."

"So how you are feeling will determine whether or not you can fly?" She only nods. "Well, we've faced danger before without this happening."

"I was not afraid of the danger, Robin. I am feeling unfamiliar confusion." I blink rapidly, unable to respond. When I don't say anything, she finally looks at me. "You are confusing me." I swallow loudly.

"Uhhh…" Oh, fuck me.

"Ever since Cyborg did the teasing and called me your girlfriend, things have felt different between us."

"Star, it's just a misunderstanding. We're fine-"

"No, Robin. I am not that naïve." She sighs and looks to the fire. "Would it really be such a terrible thing?"

"Look, you know I can't-"

"Well then I fear that we will never be 'fine'." I feel myself deflate when I hear the sad, defeated tone in her voice. But I can't date a teammate. It's just not right. Bruce would kill me. "Can you not just tell me how you feel?"

I just looked at her. For a long time, I allowed myself to gaze at her as the colors from the fire danced across her face. She did not look up and did not question my silence. And I just took her in.

For a moment, I almost forgot why we couldn't be together. For a moment, it didn't matter.

"It's great how you're- well, you're like-" _Sighhh. _"You're the strongest person I know. And I don't mean your super strength, 'cause that's pretty awesome too. But you're so brave. Almost recklessly though sometimes, but so am I." I clear my throat. "And it's cool how we can just, like, hang out together. I love spending time with you, Star." She turns toward me, the fire making her green eyes twinkle in the most beautiful way. A smile stretches across her face and makes her eyes do that cute little wrinkle thing that I love.

For a moment, this was all we needed.

**Tokyo**

I yank my hand away from Starfire's as I stand up from the ledge of the building. I look out onto the city, my mind racing. Yes, I think about this new revelation, how I might be onto something with Brushogun. But I also think about what almost just happened. Why am I so fucking stupid sometimes? This kind of thing can't happen for me, it just can't. But part of me is yearning to turn back around to face Starfire, to continue having this fun that everyone was talking about. I feel terrible for doing this to her; she's such an emotional being. She's the kind of person that needs relationships and contact with people. And as much as I really, really, want to… I can't give her that.

"But Robin, surely the Commander Daizo and his troopers can handle-"

"Well if they can handle it, why are we still here? This kind of stuff is not what we do," I snap.

"We?" she asks. I turn around to face her, and she is now standing mere inches from me.

"We're heroes, Starfire," I say sternly. "We don't have take vacations, we don't get to make mistakes, and we certainly don't have time for-"

"For what?" Her eyes narrow and her shoulders seem tense. The breath catches in my throat as I realize what I'm about to do.

"For this. For more." And it seems like everything goes silent. I can no longer here the loud city sounds below us. It is just Starfire and I looking at one another, something dying between us.

"Can we never be more than heroes, Robin? Is this all we are?"

"I know it is all that I am. And if you don't like it, then-"

"Oh, Robin. I like that part of you more than you'll ever know." And with that, she walks away, toward the stairwell on the roof of the building. I turn back to look at the city and take a deep breath. I realize now that it's sunset. Oh, well that's now ruined for us. The sunset was always our "thing"; we'd go out onto the roof of the Tower and just talk until it was dark out. It was one of the things I looked forward to most during the day.

She walked away, she didn't fly. That means I hurt her so much that she couldn't find the joy to lift her feet off the ground. I squat down on the ground and smack my hand against the roof. That would probably hurt if I could even notice pain right now. Any pain besides what I'm feeling in my chest.

Things will never be the same now. I could tell by the look in her eyes, the eyes that I love so much to look at. I lost my best friend tonight. And I'll never be able to do what I've been asked to in order to fix what I broke.

…..

I put my hands up like Daizo asks as he screams at me through the megaphone. I look around at the police force he's assembled to capture me. I watch the slow grin spread across Daizo's face as several troopers begin to move towards me with handcuffs and guns. But out of the corner of my eye, I see my savior in the sky. I wait until she's close enough to reach my hand up, so as not to direct any attention to her. We grab onto each other's forearms and I am lifted up from the ground. She speeds away, and when we are a safe distance from the troopers, she swings me up onto her back. I link my arms around her neck as we fly over the city.

"So where are we going?" I say into her ear. I feel her shiver beneath me. She turns her head toward me so I can hear her more clearly.

"We have found an abandoned house outside of the city. We will not be able to stay long, but it will be safe for now." Our eyes meet, and I just see her blush before she looks back in front of her. I smile slyly.

"Starfire," I say as I tuck my chin in the space between her neck and shoulder. I feel her shudder once again and I have to repress a chuckle. "I'm sorry."

"For which offense?" she asks.

"Will apologizing for being an ass pretty much cover all of it?" She giggles.

"I suppose so." We have just gotten out of the city and Starfire has begun her descent. "We are nearly there," she says.

It is a traditional little Japanese home, complete with a garden that is just a bit overgrown. It is unfurnished on the inside, but in the middle of the floor lays a pile of folded up clothes. My uniform.

"The others must still be on their way," says Starfire, awkwardly rubbing her arm. "I-I will give you time to-"

"Star?" I reach for her hand, preventing her from walking away. I pull her towards me a little so we're only a few inches apart. I lean forward, and I can tell when she realizes what I'm doing because she beings to lean in as well. Just as I can feel her breath against my face, the front door slides open.

"Dudes!" shouts Beast Boy. I slap my palm against my face. Of course.

…..

I lift Starfire up from the pile of black ink. I pull her onto my lap and brush ink off of her face. Her eyes flutter open as I say her name, and she smiles when she sees me.

"Hey," I mumble. She tries to sit up and I help her, then I guide her to stand. Suddenly, rain begins to fall heavily from the sky. Starfire laughs as she looks up at the dark clouds, allowing the rain to wash the blackness from her face.

And I just watch as she laughs happily and playfully, then looks back down to smile at me.

"So I've been doing some thinking," I say, taking her hands in mine and moving closer to her. "And I've decided that-"

"Robin?" says Starfire, taking another step towards me. "Stop talking."

I laugh as I lean forward and touch my lips to hers in the most simple way, completely opposite of the way my feelings are for her. I barely hear the "whoops" from Beast Boy and Cyborg. The world has gone silent and there's nothing that I need to think about except for this girl in front of me, my best friend, and the person I care about most in the world. Sorry, Bruce.

And when we lean away, I realize that she is suddenly much taller than me. When I look down at the ground and see that she's hovering, I let out a loud laugh. I grab her shoulders and pull her back down to me, wrapping my arms around her. The feeling of her arms settling around my waist is the best in the world.

"That's much better," she says quietly, and I smile at this girl who could override years of teaching by Bruce. He won't be happy about this.

* * *

**Reviews please! And if I get ten, I'll post the next chapter tomorrow :)**


	4. Year Three pt 2

**Just letting you guys know, I might not be updating this weekend because I have my graduation and I'll be very busy. **

**Enjoy! It's a long one!**

* * *

Year Three: Raven, Beast Boy: Age 17 Starfire: Age 18 Robin: Age 18 Cyborg: Age 19

**Titan Party**

Music bumped through the common room of the Tower, though it could probably be heard off of our island. The room was filled with heroes dressed as regular teenagers, donned in civilian clothes and more relaxed behavior than the way they act when patrolling. Tonight, for Cyborg's birthday party, they aren't just Titans. They are just average seventeen, eighteen, and nineteen year olds trying to "chill out", as Cyborg put it. I can't even believe that I let them have alcohol. My only rules were: no one leaves the Tower unless they can prove that they're sober, I will not participate in the clean-up, I will not be told how the alcohol was obtained, and if the cops show up, I don't know them. So here I am, just sitting on the arm of the couch, watching everything going on around me.

That is, until I overhear a certain conversation.

"Hello friends," says Starfire's voice. My eyes dart around until I find her, standing in the kitchen in front of Cyborg, Beast Boy, Kid Flash, Jinx, and Bumblebee.

"Whaddup, Star!" cheers a drunken Cyborg. I shake my head, taking a sip of my water. Yes, water. I'm the babysitter tonight.

"Hey girl, why don't you come on over here," says Bee. She takes Starfire's hand and guides her to sit next to her. I narrow my eyes… what are they up to?

They're conversation dies down in volume, but I watch as Cyborg and Beast Boy seem to be questioning Starfire. She continues to shake her head after they speak. That's when I see a mischievous smile spread across Kid Flash's face.

Cyborg holds up a bottle of clear liquid in his hand, speaking as he does so. Starfire leans toward him, and he lifts the bottle up to her nose. After a moment she leans away with a big smile on her face.

Next thing I know, she takes the bottle from his hand and places it to her lips.

I guess I should've known someone would try to get Starfire to drink. She's the innocent little alien. And this is the first alcoholic earth party she's ever been to.

I get up as I watch her take a drink. My heart pounds faster and faster the longer she drinks, putting the bottle down when it is empty. The others are obviously surprised; their mouths a slack and their eyes are wide.

"That is quite delicious!" exclaims Starfire.

"Uhh, Starfire? Most people just take little sips at a time. Doesn't that, like, burn?" asks Kid Flash.

"No?" she says, confused. "It is quite a wonderful feeling and taste. Is there more?"

"Sure girl, here you go," says Cyborg, passing her another tall bottle. I walk up behind him and Beast Boy and cross my arms.

I see Jinx's eyes grow wide once again as she points in my direction, and then erupts in a serious fit of giggles. I raise my eyebrow. Yep, she's pretty gone. Cyborg and Beast Boy slowly turn around, and Beast Boy lets out a high pitched scream when he sees me. I almost laugh.

"Uhh, hey Rob," says Beast Boy nervously.

"Who thought it would be a good idea to let her drink?" I ask.

"Not me!" slurs Kid Flash, a little too loudly. I just shake my head. I look over at Starfire and already she's downed that bottle too. I go over and snatch the empty bottle from her hands.

"Star, no more, okay?"

"Why do you never want anyone to have the fun?" she whines, her voice sounding particularly little-girlish. I groan inwardly as she fights to take the empty bottle from my hand.

"There's nothing in here!" I shout as I look back to glare at Cyborg. She snatches it from my hand tips it back into her mouth. She grimaces, and flies over to Cyborg.

"Can I have more?"

"Of course you-"

"CYBORG!"

"Uhh, I gotta go…" He grabs Bumblebee's wrist and pulls her away with him. I see Jinx wink at her as they leave. I sigh.

"Star," I say, trying to get her attention. I pull her down to the ground; it seems she can't keep her feet to the floor. "That stuff's not good for you."

"But it makes me feel so wonderful, Robin, surely you are mistaken."

"You won't feel so wonderful tomorrow if you keep drinking."

"I assure you, I will be fine." She pulls away from my grasp on her shoulders. "My people process things different than you humans. We are a resilient race," she insisted.

"Okay, but don't come crying to me when you get sick," I snapped, and even I was surprised at my rudeness. She practically recoils from my words, a frown settling on her face.

"I do the promising that I will not bother you so long as you do not bother me," she says quietly as she flies away.

"Dude, that's no way to get the girl," slurs Kid Flash. Without looking, I punch him in the arm.

"I dunno if this is me or the Captain talking, but Kid is right," Beast Boy interjects. Kid Flash smiles brightly and reaches his hand out to high-five Jinx. But she shakes her head and walks away, heading over to meet with the other girls.

"I'm not trying to- I don't like-"

"Yeah, yeah, we've heard it all before," says Kid Flash. "You really blew it after Tokyo. I mean, c'mon! You kissed her and, like, stopped talking to her."

"What?!" I look at Beast Boy who is making wide eyes at Kid Flash. "Who have you been talking to?"

"He he, just friends, you know. But they all saw it too!" he shouts defensively. "You totally blew her off. She cried to Raven for weeks!"

"Dude, you made her cry?" asks Kid. "You're so fucked."

"Look, I didn't know-"

"You told her you guys could be 'more'," says Beast Boy.

"I really see no benefits to yours and Raven's relationship," I say glumly. Raven and Beast Boy had been dating for a few months now. And apparently, Raven likes to share information. Didn't see that coming.

"Don't be jealous 'cause I got a girl," he retorts. Kid practically giggles.

"And that's my cue to leave," I say, walking over to Raven. I can't help but laugh at her. Starfire made her stay out in the common room with the others, and she agreed on two conditions: she can sit in her favorite recliner in the far corner of the room and read her book, and she is allowed to ignore anyone she wants. I hope I'm not one of those people.

I stand in front of her until she realizes I'm there. She looks up from her book and nearly smiles, but it's very difficult to tell. She pats on the arm of the recliner and so I perch on it.

"Welcome to the club," she says in her trademark monotone voice. I chuckle.

"I've got a bone to pick with you," I say. She snorts.

"Same here. You should have intervened before she got drunk," she says. I shake my head. "I have a bad feeling."

"I know. But maybe this is the only way she'll learn."

"Ah, tough love," she says pointedly.

"Er- No," I say, trying to erase the word "love" from the conversation. Raven actually laughs. I think. "But speaking of, you really need to stop talking to Beast Boy."

"Yeah, because that will lead to a successful relationship."

"You're causing trouble for me."

"No you're causing trouble for yourself," she snaps. "It's been eight months since we got back from Tokyo. Why the hell are you not holding Star's handing, acting all giggly and lovey dovey with her?"

"Okay, one: I'm not giggly. Two: It's not smart."

"No, what's not smart is pissing off an alien. And a half-demon." Right on cue, she grows an extra pair of red eyes.

"Rae, you know what I mean."

"Look, you basically lied to her in Tokyo. You got her hopes up and then smashed them with a sledgehammer."

"I didn't mean for that to happen. It's like when I got home, I came to my senses."

"No, you came to your senses in Tokyo, and returned back to your stupid ways when we got home.

"It's more complicated than you realize. Batman always said-"

"Batman isn't here, is he? And you left him for a reason. You are your own person, Robin. Make your own decisions." I sigh.

"Seriously though, Beast Boy needs to shut his mouth." She practically growls at me.

…..

An hour passed as I spent time chit chatting with Raven. Which, after I pissed her off, just involved me talking and her nodding or grunting. But there was a loud banging sound, and I searched for the noise to find Cyborg banging his fist against the kitchen countertop. When he got everyone's attention he spoke.

"Yo! Who want's to go swimming'?" There was a chorus of "whoops" and "yeah's" as just about everyone filed out of the room and out of the Tower itself. I sigh and look at Raven.

"I'm going to have to go out there. I can't let anyone escape home." She just nods as I leave and follow behind Argent and Hotspot, not too surprised to see that they are holding hands. Kid Flash flies by, picking up Jinx and tossing her onto his back before running out the door. I really hope no one drowns.

I groan as I watch everyone run off of our little patch of beach and into the ocean, holding beer cans high above their heads. I take a seat at a little picnic table that Starfire begged us to get. She and Beast Boy are the only ones who ever really come down here. She enjoys flying high above the water and dropping in. It's quite entertaining to watch.

There is a loud shriek as Kid Flash blurs his way into the water, and a splash as Jinx is tossed in. Argent and Hotspot sit on the sand with their legs in the water, both with beers in their hands. Aqualad and Beast Boy are racing, and Cyborg and Bumblebee seems to have made bets, cheering on each of their teammates.

Starfire runs toward the water but pushes of the ground just before she reaches it. She flies up and up and up at such a fast pace before suddenly stopping. She does a somersault in the air before outstretching her arms and diving downward. I honestly didn't realize how upset she had been for those couple of weeks after Tokyo. I never wanted to hurt her, I mean, it's not like we were actually together so she couldn't have gotten too attached.

Who am I kidding? It definitely wasn't easy for me to just walk away. For a few days in Tokyo, I was happy. I was excited to finally be with Starfire. But we never defined what we were, if she was my girlfriend or whatever. So when we got home and I started to doubt what we were doing, there were no strings attached. But every time I looked at her, my heart ached. I had to fight to remind myself why I couldn't be with her. I'm a hero, I have priorities, and I can't date a teammate.

But maybe Raven is right. That was Bruce's way of thinking. And despite our similarities when it comes to work ethic, I am not him. I should be able to think for myself, right?

Then again, I understand why it is unwise to date a teammate. My mind will be centered on her in battle, wondering if she's safe, if she needs help. I'll get distracted and compromise my own life, and my teammates. I can't have that.

She finally hit's the water with a large splash and the rest of the Titan's cheer for her. I keep my eyes on her as she swims towards the others, and I almost don't notice Beast Boy came back onto shore. He sees me on the picnic table and comes over, slumping against the bench. He's always green, but he really doesn't look so good.

"You alright there?" I ask, and all I get in response is a groan. "Want me to call Raven?" This time I get a groan and a thumbs up. I chuckle as I grab my communicator.

"What?" asks Raven grouchily.

"Your boy toy's not feeling so good," I tease. She narrows her eyes.

"Shut. Up." I laugh.

"Seriously though, wanna come down and get him? I'm sure that if you're taking care of BB, Starfire will let you leave the party." Her eyes light up. Suddenly her black raven appears before me, grabbing up Beast Boy and disappearing again.

I sigh. Alone again. I look down at my watch; it reads 11:48. Jeez, some of them are so far gone and its not even midnight yet. I place my elbows on my knees and rest my chin in my hands as I babysit. Kid Flash and Jinx are making out in the water, Argent and Hotspot are cuddling on the sand, Jericho and Kole and politely holding hands- wait, when did that happen?

It seems as though the Titans have really begun to pair off, with members of my team included. Bee and Cyborg have been dating for a few months on and off. I'm not really a fan of that relationship. I don't know if Bee is too trustworthy when it comes to guys. But Raven and Beast Boy have been, for the most part, approvable together. I've seen Raven smile more often than she used to.

"Yo Rob!" shouts Cyborg as he waves spastically at me. I wave back with less enthusiasm. He says something to Bumblebee before he jogs over to me. "How you doin'?" he asks as he takes a seat beside me on the picnic table. I sigh loudly. "Guess that answers my question. What's the problem?"

"No problem here."

"I was only asking to see if you'd give me a straight answer. I know what the problem is. What's going on with Star?" he asks.

"She's mad at me I guess," I grumble.

"Of course she is."

"But w-"

"If you ask why, I'll punch you."

"Okay, okay," I say, "I guess I know why. But I didn't do anything wrong."

"You hurt her. I'd consider that pretty damn wrong."

"But she has to know that I didn't mean to hurt her. I was doing what I thought was best for the team."

"For the team?!" he exclaims, eyes wide. "Man, you two finally getting together is what's best for this team. Starfire avoids you at all costs in battle. And we can't all just hang out together anymore 'cause its too damn awkward. I hope you didn't think that everything would just go back to normal after you dumped her."

"I didn't dump her, we weren't even actually dating!"

"You kissed her, dude. It was her first glimpse at what a relationship is like on earth, and what you did was show her that guys will just kiss ya and ditch ya." I raise my eyebrow at his choice of words, but I get what he's saying.

"But it wasn't like that," I say. I actually care about Starfire, and that's why I had to end it. I care too much. It's not good.

"Does she know that?"

"I told her why we couldn't be together."

"What exactly did you say?" he asks.

"Heroes can't have relationships," I reply.

"Do you see the problem with that yet?" He forcibly turns me head back towards the crowd of heroes in the water. "Everyone has someone." And as I look in the water, I realize that he's right. Everyone here but Starfire and I had somebody; even Pantha and Gnaark got together. "So she probably thinks you were lying to her."

"Why would I lie?"

"To protect her feelings." Oh shit, no wonder she hates me. She thinks there is some hidden reason why I thought we shouldn't be together. Damn it!

"Oh this is not good," I say.

"Don't worry man, I got this." I jerk my head over to look at him and he winks at me. "Yo! Everybody back in the Tower!" There is a chorus of whining. "C'mon, it's time for the Titan Beer Pong Championship!"

"Fuck yeah!" shouts Kid Flash as he scoops up Jinx once again and races into the Tower. I shake my head and get up from the picnic table to follow the crowd back inside. Cyborg walks up beside me with Bumblebee on his arm.

"How is beer pong going to help me out?" I ask him.

"Well, now everyone is back inside and all in the same place. You can figure if out from here, bird boy." I grimace. This isn't gonna be easy.

…..

"Girls against guys! Round one, Bee and Star vs. Kid and Aqualad," says Cyborg as he sets up the red solo cups on our ping pong table. I plop down on the couch to watch the action. Normally I wouldn't care to watch, but Starfire is taking part in the game.

Cyborg takes time to explain the game to Star before they take their places at either side of the table. Just before Bee is about to take her turn, Kid Flash stops her and decides on a new rule; before each round, every player must take three shots. I smack my hand against my forehead. Why did Starfire have to play this damn game?

I watch with a frown on my face as Star takes the shots like a champ. It's almost funny how everyone else in the room shudders as they watch her as well. It is very strange how alcohol doesn't taste the same way to her. Then again, she does drink mustard.

The game begins and -long story short- Starfire ends up having poor aim, drinks the majority of the beers in front of her, then gets angry and blasts Cyborg and Kid Flash's cups. She then claims that since they no longer have any beers left in front of them, she and Bumblebee win. That's when they create a new rule; Starfire isn't allowed to play when she's already drunk.

At this point she's starting to lose her balance, and she practically falls into the arm chair across the living room area from me. I get up from the couch to go talk to her, but she's whisked away by Bumblebee, Argent, and Wonder Girl. When I see the bottle of vodka in Bee's hand, I groan.

Starfire open's the common room door and leads the girls toward the elevator. Shit, they're not supposed to leave the common room. I follow after them but they get onto the elevator before I can stop them. I run up the stairs to the bedroom level; I'm assuming Star's taking them to her room. Sure enough, just as the elevator door opens, I look down the hall to see Starfire's bedroom door closing.

I'm just about to knock on the door when I hear my name through the door. They're talking about me? I lean closer and place my ear against the metal.

"So what's going on with him, Starfire?" asks Bee. "Here, take a drink."

"Thank you," says Star. "Nothing is going on."

"Oh you know we can keep a secret."

"No truly, there is absolutely nothing happening between us. He does not want me."

"Wait, then what was that whole thing in Tokyo?" It is silent for a moment. Starfire must be surprised the Bee knows anything about that. "What? Cy tells me everything."

"Let me have another drink, please." More silence. "He told me that we could be more than just friends. Than just heroes."

"Meaning like boyfriend and girlfriend?" asks Argent.

"He never asked me to be his girlfriend, but he kissed me."

"Oh my Gods!" exclaims Wonder Girl. "What was it like?"

"He looks like a good kisser," stated Argent.

"I don't know," says Bee, "he seems a little awkward sometimes, doesn't he?"

"But he's just so powerful and strong," says Wonder Girl wistfully. I raise an eyebrow. The room is silent for a moment. "Sorry," she murmurs.

"Right… Anyway, how was your first earth kiss?" questions Bee impatiently.

"Not a single chick flick could have prepared me for how wonderful it was," Starfire whispers, her voice catching at the end. I hear her sniffle.

"Star, don't cry. Here, let the vodka wash away your sorrows." It goes quiet again as Starfire takes a drink.

"Why does he not like me?" Star cries. My shoulders slump. I like her so much more than I should. I don't want her to cry.

"'Cause he's an idiot. Simple as that," says Wonder Girl.

"He told me that heroes do not have time to do the dating. But you have Cyborg, and you have Hot Spot, and you have begun dating Aqualad. Surely there must be some other reason."

"Maybe he just realized that you're too good for him," offers Bee.

"But I do not believe that I am."

"So maybe he's just scared. I mean, as far as we know, he's never been in a relationship. And you're just so goddamn beautiful that you're intimidating."

"Yeah! So you just gotta make him not scared anymore," says Argent, slurring. I bet they almost have that bottle finished off.

"Seduce him," Bee purrs. "Jump in the shower with him naked. At that point he'll be thinking with his boner and all fear will be thrown out the window."

"What is a boner?" asks Starfire innocently. Okay, that's it. _Knock, knock, knock._

"Who is it?" sings Argent. I roll my eyes. She's so tiny, I'm sure she gets drunk pretty quickly.

"It's Robin," I grumble. I hear muffled whispers, then suddenly the door slides open, revealing Bee. She has a peculiarly amused expression on her face.

"What's up, Rob?" she asks playfully.

"Everyone's supposed to stay in the common room. Time to come back down," I reply.

"He really is no fun, huh Star?" Bee turns to ask Starfire, who is sitting on her bed with the other two girls. She waves them over and they make their way to the door. "Alright, we're coming."

"Actually, I need to talk to Starfire." The other three girls release "ooo's" as a drunken Star leans against little Argent with a blush on her cheeks. She probably won't remember what I talk to her about anyway.

"Here Star," says Wonder Girl, handing her the nearly-empty bottle. "Liquid courage." Starfire takes it, but keeps her eyes glued to the floor. I watch the girls go down the hall to make sure they head to the elevator. When I look back at Star, I see that she's finished off the bottle.

"Do you promise no more?" I ask as I take the bottle from her hands.

"I do not have to promise you anything," she mutters angrily.

"Okay…" I walk over to her dresser and set the bottle down. I hear Starfire sniffling behind me. I quickly turn around and look back at her and she jumps in surprise. She angles herself away from my gaze, but I can see that she is wiping tears from her eyes.

"Starfire…" I go to her, placing my hand on her shoulder

"No," she says, jerking away from my touch. "You do not get to do that."

"Do what?" I plead.

"Comfort me like you are my friend."

"Star, I am your friend. You're my best friend-"

"No!" she shouts, and she turns around sharply to glare at me with glowing green eyes. But she loses her balance and stumbles into me. I reach out and catch her, pulling her into my chest. "Let go of me!"

"Just calm down!" I walk over to her bed, practically dragging her with me. If she really wanted me to let go, she could easily break my hold. I just about drop her onto the bed. She bounces on the mattresses with a pout set onto her face. "Can we please just talk about all of this?"

"There is nothing to talk about. Do not worry, I completely understand," she mutters. She sits up on the bed and I move to stand in front of her. But she refuses to look at me.

"I don't think you do-"

"Yes, it is not that we cannot be together, it is that you do not want me. You could have just said that and saved yourself all of this trouble."

"Oh come on, Star, you know that's not it-"

"Please, do not put me through this again." Her voice breaks, and I think my heart does too.

"Just-just listen to me, okay?" I ask, kneeling in front of her and grabbing her hands. "Star, look at me." She peeks out at me from beneath her eyelashes. "I swear to you that if I could be with you, I would."

"Stop it, you-"

"Listen!" She makes an "eep" noise when I raise my voice. "I like you. I do. So much more than I should. And that's one of the reasons why we can't be together."

"But why?" she whines. "I do not understand. All of other Titans are dating one another. Raven and Beast Boy have been together for months and everything is just fine."

"I know, but it's not just that. In battle, I'll be worrying about you all the time and I'll get distracted."

"Do you not already worry about me?" Her question throws me off. Yes, of course I do. I'm always looking for her out of the corner of my eye to make sure she's alright.

"Uhh, yeah."

"Well then that is not a reason."

"It's still way more complicated-"

"How is it so complicated? If everyone else can be together and be happy, why can't we be happy, Robin?" She grips my hands and looks me directly in my masked eyes. Tears begin to run down her cheeks. Every time I see her cry, I swear I die a little inside. Especially when I cause it.

"I can't think of myself, I can't just do what I want," I say softly. "I'm a hero."

"And that is all you are," she says, mirroring my tone, but hers holds conviction.

"Please, I don't want to lose you."

"You told me we could be more," she whispers. Her voice trembles as she speaks. "You lied to me."

"No, it's not like that-"

"I don't want to talk to you anymore," she says, losing her grip on her emotions. I watch as she breaks down in front of me, sobs ripping from her chest.

"Star, no…" I sit down on the bed next to her and wrap my arms around her. Her cries become more forceful until she begins hiccupping. I stroke her back, trying to calm her down. But there's just too much alcohol in her system, even for an alien, and she's just too worked up.

She leans away from me and vomits onto her bedroom floor.

I jump up and grab her long hair, but I was too late. I wrap her hair around my arm, not paying attention to the substance along the red strands, and I pat her back until she gets it all out. Damn, that will probably be hard to clean.

She sits back up on the bed, her face covered in a sheen of sweat and a dribble of bile down her chin and onto her tank top. I tried not to pay attention to her cleavage at a time like this.

"Star? Hey, hey, just lay down, okay?" She slumps against me, eyes half-lidded. When I can't get her to budge, I get up from the bed and cradle her in my arms. I lay her on her back, tell her that I'll be right back, and then head down to the elevator.

I go down the common room hoping to find a half-sober girl who can help clean Starfire up. Instead, I find a room full of passed-out-drunk teenagers and a bunch of air mattresses. I try to wake up Bee and Jinx, but I don't get a response from either. Argent, Wonder Girl, and Kole are no help either. I call Raven on my communicator, but the sound of Beast Boy heaving in the background was enough to tell me that she couldn't help.

When I head back up to Starfire's room, I find her lying in a puddle of her own vomit. God damn. I stare at her for a moment, trying to figure out what to do. She'll definitely need a shower, but none of the girls would come to help me. Ughh, this is not going to help my resolve.

I go to her dresser and pull open one drawer after another. When I open her "delicates" drawer, I think I stop breathing. But I decide that she can just deal with going commando for a night. I pull out a pair of shorts that I think are actually for training and a t-shirt that looks way too big for her slender frame. I go back down the hall to the bathroom across from my bedroom. I place the clothes on the counter and head back to Star's room to get her. I cradle her once again, ignoring the vomit that is now on my clothes as well, and carry her down the hall to the bathroom.

"Starfire? Do you think you could wake up just a bit?"

"Want…sleep…" Her head lulls against my shoulder.

"You can't sleep until you're all clean." I set her down on her feet and she leans heavily on me. She looks up at me, her green eyes clouded.

"Please, let's just…go to bed…" Her eyes flutter shut. I sigh and sling her arm over my shoulders. Pulling her along with me, I go to the shower and turn it on.

"Star, can you do this?"

"So tired, Robin."

"I know, but if you can shower, you can go to bed."

"Need help," she says louder now, a whinier tone in her voice. I can tell she's waking up more.

"C'mon, Star, you don't want me to see you like that."

"What if… I do?" She giggles, then hiccups, and I can feel her body heave as she gags. Just in time, I lean her over the toilet as she spews once again. She braces herself against it and I kneel beside her holding her hair back. Once she's done, I settle her down to sit against the wall. I remain kneeling in front of her, watching and waiting, the bathroom slowly filling up with steam from the warm shower.

"Help," she says once again.

"Fine, but you're keeping your underwear on." She nods weakly, her eyelids drooping. I can tell she's not going to do much, so I crawl over to her to help her undress. I reach forward, but yank my hands back. God, this is so weird. I spend half of my time focusing on not thinking about Starfire in any way that isn't platonic. But now as I focus on not getting too excited, I unbutton her jeans and peel them down her long legs. I gulp and take a deep breath before I pull her tank top up over her head. Damn it, why did she have to wear black. And everything matches. Oh God, _breathe. _

I snake my arm around her waist and stand her up, moving her into the shower. I grip her upper arms tightly, holding her under the water.

"Can you hold yourself up?" I ask her. She shakes her head. I get into the shower behind her and hold her against my chest. "Well, can you hold onto me so I can wash your hair?" She grumbles a response, but I feel her arms wrap around my waist, and she leans her head into the crook of my neck.

I run shampoo through her hair, making sure to really scrub the ends. After that, I very carefully wash her face, and then every other affected area. That also, unfortunately, included her chest. It helped to pretend that she was Beast Boy… that was definitely a turn off.

I shut off the water, grab a towel off the rack, and pat her dry. As I'm drying her off, I notice that she's smiling. I raise an eyebrow.

"Does something amuse you?" I inquire, scooping her up again so I can lift her out of the shower. I set her back on her feet, but she stays close to me. When she wraps her arms around my waist again, I begin to panic.

"Was that seductive enough for you?" she asks teasingly. I feel her breath against my neck and a shiver runs through me.

"Okay, get dressed and then you can go to bed." She sighs.

"I get you in the shower with me, and yet you still do not want me." She leans away from me and walks toward the counter. But she stumbles, so I catch her by her elbow and lower her to the ground.

"Here," I say, tossing her clothes beside her. "Don't try to get back up. I'll be right back." I'm hoping she actually does get dressed, and I have my doubts, but I leave the room anyway. I wait outside the door, tapping my foot impatiently. Minutes go by and I get suspicious, so I knock on the door. When she doesn't answer, I go back inside, hoping that she's dressed.

She's slumped against the wall where I left her, obviously asleep, and thankfully dressed. Even passed out drunk she's beautiful. I bend down to pick her up and I carry her across the hall into my bedroom. There will be a lot of explaining to do in the morning if anyone sees her walking out of here. I'm sure Raven would jump to conclusions and send me straight to hell.

I stumble through the dark room and to my bed, then I balance Starfire on my hip as I try to find the light switch on my bedside lamp. I pull the blankets aside and get her settled in. I brush her damp hair out of her face and she sighs. For a second I think she's woken up, but after waiting a moment, I know she's still asleep.

Now that she's finally taken care of, I go over to the bathroom to drop dirty clothes and used towel into the laundry shoot. After that I go back to Starfire's bedroom. I pull the dirtied covers off of her bed and take them over to the laundry shoot. I check the time… just after 2:00. Well, it's never too late to clean vomit off the floor.

Once everything is all clean, I head back to my bedroom. First, I go to my closet to retrieve a couple of spare blankets and create a makeshift bed on my floor. Then I take off my wet clothes and put on a pair of shorts. It wasn't until now that I realized how tired I am. My eyes grow heavy as I sit down on the floor and lay back onto the blankets. Shit, forgot a pillow. I grudgingly get back up and quietly walk over to the bedside opposite of Starfire. I reach for the pillow beside her bed and am startled when she grabs my wrist.

Without opening her eyes, she says "Stay with me." And for some selfish reason, I do.

…..

I wake up very early in the morning; my internal clock tells me to. My neck hurts… why am I sleeping sitting up? Damn, this is so uncomfortable. I move to sit up, but stop when I hear a groan. I almost would've forgotten about last night if it weren't for the red head with her arms wrapped around my stomach. I feel my heart begin to race as I realize that my one arm is draped over her back and my hand is holding hers securely. We slept like this? It just seems so… intimate.

And that's when I finally come to my senses. Even unconsciously, I'm drawn to her. I need her. And she's made it clear that she needs me too. I run my fingers through her hair, gently combing out the tangles that last nights shower caused. The fingers of her free hand curl against my bare chest. I can practically feel her wake up.

She slowly angles her head to look up at me. Her eyes grow wide when they meet mine and she quickly sits up, obviously regretting it soon after. She places a hand against her head and I watch as her eyes go to our joined hands on my stomach. Her gaze flickers up to mine. I wonder if she remembers anything that happened last night.

"Um… Robin? Why am I in your bed?" she asks shyly.

"Well, you puked all over yours." Her eyes widen again.

"I do feel quite nauseated. And my head hurts."

"Did I tell you this would happen? Alcohol only makes you feel good for a little while."

"I have learned my lesson. But I also have many more questions." Her fingers tighten around mine.

"Yeah, uhh I don't really know where to begin with that. You asked me to stay with you last night and-"

"Oh Robin, I am sorry," she says, pulling her hand away. I feel myself deflate.

"No, it's okay. I-I wanted to." I feel my cheeks grow warm. Fuck, I better not blush. "Star, look, I really want to talk to you about that whole thing in Tokyo, and what's been going on lately-"

"We do not need to talk about it, I understand."

"Could you stop interrupting for a second? I'm trying to tell you that I was an idiot." She stares at me for a moment, possibly registering what I'm saying. "Starfire, I'm sorry for hurting you. I've been hurting myself at the same time. I wanna be with you. Can you forgive me?"

A slow smile spreads across her face and her eyes fill up with tears. Before I can say another word, she throws her arms around my neck and holds me in one of her signature bone crushing hugs. I choke out a laugh as I pry at her arms, trying to get her to loosen her hold. Finally she releases me, and then suddenly looks embarrassed.

"What is it?" I ask.

"Excuse me; I must go brush my teeth." She rises up from my bed and flies out of my room. Suddenly I'm just sitting in my room, all alone, but completely happy. I get up from my bed and walk out of my room.

"Dude, why was Starfire just coming out of your bedroom?" asks Beast Boy. I look down the hall to see him and Raven standing outside of her bedroom door. I just wave them off and walk over to the bathroom.

I feel like I'm waiting for forever until finally the bathroom door opens, and she's standing there, her beautiful green eyes all wide and surprised. Her lips curl up in a smile, but before she can speak, I pounce. My hands slide over her hips and around her back, pulling her close to me. I can hear her breath catch as I lean just inches away from her face, and press my lips against hers.

And I don't think I've ever been so happy in my entire life.

* * *

**How are you liking it? Just a couple more chapters of drabbles and then I'm starting the full on story. **

**Reviews please! :)**


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